Ever Seen a 32 Year Old Shit Their Pants?

It’s Friday. Friday’s are always rough for me because Thursday is All You Can Eat Wing Night at Hooters. $10.99 for All You Can Eat Wings? No-brainer. Besides that, Hooters has $20 tanks of Miller Lite. At 128 oz., those tanks are packing some serious beer making Hooters the best deal on Thursday nights. However, just as in The Perfect Storm, every so often my boy CK wants to go out after work for some beers on a Thursday creating a long night of drinking. Well, long for a 32 year old. When I was 24, even 27 it would be no problem. I’m over hanging with CK pounding tall boy PBR’s and shots of Fireball, then I head over to Hooters for wings and beers. Now I’m sitting here trying to write a blog and shitting my pants.

Thursday’s also tend to be my sleepless nights. I get home by 9, pass out at 10 and usually wake up around 2 or 3 am. So I woke up at 3 am, went to the couch and started watching some TV. Nothing tends to be on at this time in the morning, so I basically flipped around for about an hour and was just about to go to bed, when I noticed Monster of the Nudist Colony on Showtime. Intriguing. It stars my girl Lexi Belle. Intriguinger. So I start watching this movie, softcore of course on Showtime, and I stumble across this hot ass bitch after my first jerk session. I’m tired and ready for bed now, so I start doing some research on this movie so I can find this chick and download some movies of her. It turns out Monster of the Nudist Colony is a new release and there is literally no info on it on the Internet, with the exception of the fact that Lexi Belle and Angie Savage (not the hot girl) are in the movie. Now I have to stay up until the movie is over to watch the credits and find this chick, lest I never find out who she is. Of course, I squeeze in another jerk session at 5:15 and feel the geyser about to erupt just as the movie ends and fades to the credits. This smokin’ hot chick is named Melissa Jacobs. I wasn’t able to find any scenes of her getting plowed by a dude, but I did find SOME scenes that I downloaded over night and look forward to “enjoying” after work. Mmmmmm. Story over. Fail Friday will come later.

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